Where There is Tea, There is Hope

Well, I have the boat, I have the roof rack and I have the other gear. What I don’t have is the skillset.

But I had booked a two day course to get the Kayaker’s knowledge for a ‘one star’ certificate under the auspices of the local canoe club.

Went down to Hampton and checked in by 10 am. We, that’s me and five others, were on the water by 11 am after some decidedly inventive entries into the boats at the quayside. Luckily what little skill I had picked up on the taster course that I took 18 months ago, came back and I didn’t have too much trouble paddling round in large circles. It seemed quite stable and after a while I started almost getting used to the rudder, a feature that wasn’t on the previous boats. We practiced various drills and paddle strokes and all went reasonably well.

After a lunch we went onto further practice of what we had been shown in the morning. We carried out an excursion to near Molesey lock, and tried to slalom around some posts near the lock. By this time, about three hours in the water, I was getting tired and found it difficult to keep my upper body upright. Sitting further back didn’t help any as that was on the rear edge of the moulded seat. Once again all the course participants displayed some inventive routs through the course, including three point turns. At this point disaster struck. I was just exiting the slalom course for the second time when I found myself crosswise across the river and a tree branch bearing down on me. My attempt at trying to fend it off in a overtired and over-confident state, sent me into the water.

It was cold and it was deep. This episode ended with me, boat and paddle being rescued to a floating pontoon, pulled out by the instructor and having to drain and re-board the boat in a very wet, tired and cold state. I was the third unintentional swimmer of the day and my recovery was deemed good enough to be excused-boots from the capsize practices at the end of the day. All I had to do was to paddle out to a loose boat, straddle it with one leg, and paddle both back to shore.

All in all a good-ish day, but the lack of abdominal(?) strength and the Buddha-belly that is getting in the way spoiled the ability to pick up the lessons at the end of course day. A hot cup of tea on return to the clubhouse brought back some of the body heat lost on the river. Next week we are going for a ‘long’ paddle to put into effect today’s lessons. Clearly I’m going to have to work on the stomach and back muscles for next week, or probably get wet again...

I can’t wait... Anyone for tea?


2 Miles